True Lies

Prometheus does a great job compiling all the damning details that make Arnold Schwarzenegger’s California candidacy a laughable spectacle.

But what if he announced as a Democrat? Can you imagine the critique from the Right?

“Another Hollywood type who is out-of-touch with mainstream American values thinks making sadistic movies has somehow prepared him to oversee the world’s fifth largest economy? He’s not ready to be dog catcher in Mayberry.”

“He’s a horrible role model for children. The violence, the steroids, the womanizing. The Democrats should be ashamed to have him. Hell, he even talks funny. Uh, don’t tell him I said that, okay?”

I wanna post it all, but you can just go on over and read the rest.

It does seem to me that the Republican embrace of Schwarzenegger is blatantly hypocritical. The news networks should roll tapes of these same indignant politicos and pundits telling Janeane Garafalo, Sean Penn and the Dixie Chicks to shut up and stick to their day job, and that as entertainers they had no right to even voice their opinions about the looming war. How, by that standard, is the considerably less sharp Schwarzenegger even remotely qualified to run the most populous state in the union, with the world’s fifth-largest economy?

Republicans, who say they’re only trying to move the state forward and Get Shit Done, will instead accomplish just the opposite. If successful, the recall will herald the spread of a disturbing trend in politics: the permanent campaign. Indeed, elected officials everywhere will be pushed harder to put political expediency before hard choices. They will conceal bad news, lest the partisans pounce on tough times and, feigning outrage, coerce their lemmings into forcing electoral do-overs.

There are still a few of us out there who value some measure of plausible common sense in the political process. We can take heart in the fact that Schwarzenegger will lose to Lt. Gov. Cruz Bustamante in the recall election.

How do we know Schwazenegger will lose? Because less than a week into his candidacy, the man has already peaked. His slide will hasten, I think, once he begins to discuss major policy issues and the public realizes their star bodybuilder is decidedly lightheaded.

Schwarzenegger will be attacked on the right by the same idiotic and impractical Republicans who got duped into choosing sure loser Bill Simon over sure winner Richard Riordan. And he’ll be attacked by California’s liberal Left for being, well, a Republican.

But Schwarzenegger (boy is it tiring typing that name), in the end, will be done in by the moderates. With the help of Feinstein, Bustamante, and in no small part the loathsome Gray Davis himself, these voters will slowly realize that gee, $38 billion is a whole lot of money, and this state is in too dangerous a position to hand the reins to some inexperienced celebrity who will need on-the-job training. As the election draws near, look for these people to gradually sober up on Schwhatever’s star-studded candidacy.

Personally, I think that once you get past all the hooplah, the real reason California voters should reject him is because Terminator 3 sucked, as did pretty much every other movie he’s made in the last decade, save for True Lies. And did you see Jingle All The Way? Even Gray Davis wouldn’t have green-lighted that one.

When you really think about it, Ah-nold has already wasted our money, $8 at a time, for a couple of years now. And from the looks of his career, it doesn’t look like he’ll ever make up that deficit.

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One Response to True Lies

  1. Stirling S Newberry says:

    What this is about is having a Republican in Sact’o to veto any Democratic Congressional redistricting that might happen in response to Texas – and to make the Democrats have to play defense in CA.

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